The “meat” of it

August 30, 2010 at 3:09 pm Leave a comment

Our wedding planning was relatively drama free.  The one bit of pre-wedding drama that we encountered had to do whether or not my brother would wear a tie while escorting my mom down the aisle.  Admittedly it was a silly fight to pick, there were tears shed and feelings bruised but in the end this silly bit of drama uncovered something that stopped me dead in my tracks.

Source

My brother felt that our wedding was superficial, that I was only concerned about the aesthetics and the details.  When he told me this, tears welled up in my eyes and I couldn’t wrap my head around how he could have this perception.  Then he told me, “well its all you blog about and all you talk about”.   (He doesn’t read my blog mind you, but his wife, my MOH does and keeps him up to date)

Ah-ha! It all made sense. IF you are looking at our wedding through the lense of what I write about on Weddingbee then yes, you might deduce (as my brother did) that I overly concerned with the superficial elements of a wedding.  I became aware that my blogging had focused very much on the details and all the trappings of the wedding but not on the personal journey that Mr Pretzel and I were on to prepare for our marriage.  On top of it, a little nagging voice asked “do people really care about this stuff?”  I notice that when people ask about the wedding, I gravitate to the material stuff (the dress, the venue, etc) because I don’t want to bore them with the heavier, deeper stuff.

I guess it boils down to the fact that the meaty stuff- the really, really, good stuff- well it was just too personal to write about while we were in the midst of it.  I planned out whole posts to write about how we as a couple prepared for the sacrament of marriage, the blessing that was our engaged encounter, and how we crafted our ceremony to reflect us as a couple and our love of our faith.  But when my fingers hit the keyboard I had a block.

These things were my favorite parts of wedding preparation and planning and I could not write about them.  To write about them would take a lot of time and careful consideration and to be honest, with all other wedding tasks on our plates I didn’t feel I could do any of them justice.  “After the wedding I’ll write these posts” I kept telling myself.  Well, it’s almost two months after the wedding and it is time.

In the next few posts I’ll share with you the “meat” of the Pretzel wedding, how we got to the alter. I’m grateful that my brother raised these concerns, because it aired misconceptions that he had and gave me an opportunity to let him see more of our wedding preparation from an insider’s view.  It also made me realize that people who love you don’t really care about the details and material stuff, it’s the meaty stuff they want to hear about.

Are there parts of your planning that you find it hard to share with others?  Why?

Oh and if you are wondering about the tie- he didn’t wear one but looked great in a tuxedo shirt- a classic example of me being wrong.

Image courtesy of MOH Tig

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Entry filed under: Family.

Lets Start Planning Again “P” is for Prayer

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